Emotions and Why We Aren’t Allowed To Have Them.

Personally, I have a hard time believing the amount of restrictions that are put on our emotions, day-to-day. It’s a social thing, I guess. There’s a distinct gender bias, as well. Women are supposed to be happy and gentle and content, but are also allowed to cry and be upset and weak. Well, as long as they don’t cry too much. And God forbid they get angry! Although, if they do get angry, obviously it’s just That Time Of Month. Ugh. Men are supposed to be happy as well, but there’s also a distinct allowance for Manpain. You know, stewing in your own angst and anger, which, as fun as it is to wallow in self-pity, is kind of… immature, I guess?


the rain represents my angst over my parents’ death.

“Oh, there she goes, restricting emotions. Hypocrite.” No. Go ahead, be angry and sad and angsty, but there are productive ways to express emotion and Very Not Okay ways to express emotion. If you’re intentionally hurting other people in an attempt to release anger, that is Not Okay. Really, wallowing in emotion and not doing/saying anything to try and move forwards isn’t okay. Part of being a grown-up is learning to accept your emotions and channel them productively. For example, the whole “pulling pigtails” thing is only okay when you’re five and have no idea what to do with your emotions. By twelve, it’s starting to get annoying, and if you are a grown adult then it is absolutely unacceptable.

darcy and elizabeth fighting

I’m only a jerk because I’m emotionally constipated and have no idea how to deal with my attraction to you.

On another note, why isn’t anyone allowed to be enthusiastic? If you’re enthusiastic about a show you like or a book you’re reading, you’re a Geek (tm.) Interestingly, this doesn’t apply to sports. If you’re enthusiastic about sports, you’re just a normal, everyday guy. Personally, I would rather read about/watch the interesting emotional conflict and dilemmas of fictional people, possibly with dragons. It’s not a bad thing, okay? If you’re enthusiastic about basically anything, you’re embarrassing yourself. You’re not supposed to call people for three days after your first date. Why? Why can’t you text the person when you get home? Or the next day? “Oh, I forgot to mention, your dress was absolutely lovely.” “Hey, have you watched that new show?” “See you soon : )” Is it a crime to be enthusiastic about spending time and having conversations with someone you really like?

the face of enthusiasm

The iconic symbol of utter enthusiasm

I get enthusiastic about everything. I giggle a lot, and I bounce with pure happiness when I’m around my friends. The other day my sister pulled me aside and explained, in a hushed, half-condescending tone, that I was embarrassing myself and she was ashamed to be around me. Why? Because I was giggling and participating in the conversation, and she felt like I was “trying to draw attention to myself” and “flirting” with my male friends. Okay, first of all, no. Secondly, what does it matter? I like having attention on me. Most people do. The one thing everyone wants to talk about is themselves. I have a blog! It’s a thing! I talk about my life and then sit back and watch the view count go up with a smug little feeling like “Oh, yeah, people care about what I have to say, mm-hmm.”

Griff as Mike Wazowski

My face when I get a new follower

Also, unbiased opinions. I mean, obviously, some people are going to be more biased about certain issues than others, but everyone is biased, really. If you were asked to give your honest, unbiased opinion on whether slavery was a positive or negative thing, I’m willing to bet all of you (Or most of you, I hope) will reply with a resounding “negative.” A hundred years ago, the answer would have been overwhelmingly “positive”– at least among the white people who would have been the only ones asked. Culture is a thing. Emotions are a thing. Even Vulcans, who take “emotional suppression” to the boss levels, have emotions, very powerful ones, apparently. Yes, I used a fictional species in my real-life essay. Shhhh, this isn’t professional, I can do things like that.


To be fair, I’m pretty sure pissing people off is one of Kirk’s superpowers.

So, basically, I have just spewed a bunch of emotions about the suppression of emotions in an attempt to provoke emotion. Emotions are important. You’re allowed to have them. It’s okay. If anyone tells you you’re not allowed to feel a certain way, then kick their (redacted) and feel it anyway. (Note: As I said earlier, this doesn’t mean “act however you want.” It means”feel however you want.”) Sometimes, in order to allow ourselves to feel, we end up hurting other people. I guess what I’m trying to say is, if you’re angry about something someone said, tell them so. Don’t yell “You’re a horrible person and I hate you!” and stomp off. Express yourself! It’s okay! You’re allowed! “It really made me angry when you said _______.”


But hey, what do I know, I’m just an emotional 14 year old girl, right?



This entry was posted in Crazy Cool Stuff I've Learned, Emotional And Personal and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Emotions and Why We Aren’t Allowed To Have Them.

  1. tschiller says:

    The art of fighting fair. Whaahaha…

Discuss! Reply! Give feedback!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s