Originally, this blog was supposed to be something like a journal. I would meticulously write out anything interesting that happened during the day and share it with the Internet so I didn’t bore my family members with trite details about things like anime or how lovely the sky is when it’s just beginning to rain or what books I got at the library. Here, I can tell stories about my day as clearly and articulately as possible, and get a variety of feedback, from views to likes to comments, to followers. (Thanks for that, by the way. It gives me all kinds of warm fuzzies, like fluffy socks straight from the dryer. I’ve been trying to be more diligent about liking and commenting on posts I find interesting, since it only takes a minute and can make someone’s day.)
However, there are some things too personal to put on the internet, for everyone to read and scrutinize and criticize. So I’ve started a journal on Penzu.com. It touts security and privacy for your journal, and it allows me to spill my guts about whatever is bothering me at the moment, in a private, secure way. I’ve been weirdly depressed lately, so it helps a lot to be able to rant at length without being judged or making myself vulnerable to anyone.
Therapeutic, I think, is the word I’m searching for. I can tell secrets and rant about things and philosophize and plot people I’m angry at’s deaths in detail and talk about things that are too controversial for other people to hear. It also helps get my writing flowing if I write freeform about my own feelings and impressions for a thousand words or so. I highly recommend starting a journal. Don’t bother trying to do it daily, or recounting your day, just spill about your emotions. Trust me, it helps a lot to be able to talk about it, even if the only thing you write is “I hate my sister, I want her to get run over by a bus,” fifty times in a row. Don’t worry about grammar, about political correctness, about apologizing for what you’re saying. Just write.